I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize