I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize