i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
