it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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