Im at strip club and am horny
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
We're too hungover to prance.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize