I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
