we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
