That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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