She said her name was "party"
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
