She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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