): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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