loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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