I like my sex mixed with concussions.
one might say we're banned from that church
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
