Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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