she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
