sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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