Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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