She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
True college students do jello shots in the library
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
