no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
