I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
