And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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