butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
