i don't want you to think of me as your TA
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize