you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
