But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize