Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
