"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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