So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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