did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
