don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
