I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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