wake up i wanna do it froggy style
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
