If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize