Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Randomize