Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize