I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
True strength comes from lack of pants
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
