check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
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