i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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