I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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