Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
