DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
