I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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