Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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