Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
