i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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