i will never coherently bang her
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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