She said her name was "party"
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I want to be your penis for a week.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize