you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
