respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
