Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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